Don't Be a Fickle Friend

It’s already September folks! Where has the time gone? For a year that was shut down and closed for the first half, ironically seems to have flown by faster than previous years. If this year has taught us anything, it is the concept of fellowship and friendship, and how we were designed to be in communion and communication with people. Some of us have struggled and continue to struggle with loneliness as we navigate this life. Friendship is such a precious gift from the Father and it is our duty to nourish and water this seed. It is a fine balance of honesty and true intended pursuit.

The reality for most of us, is that we have been let down, betrayed, or have had expectations that were not met in some of the previous friendships we have been in. And so, this makes us a bit apprehensive in pursuing people. Don’t let this mindset convince you that you are better off isolated and alone. We really need to start being more accountable, less fickle and increase integrity in our lives so that this can pour into the people closest to us. It’s time to get real!

The Bible says,

"Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm,” (Proverbs 13:20).

The Bible also mentions the idea of bad company, and how this can ruin one’s morals (1 Corinthians 15:33). Not only do we have a duty to maintain friendship and fellowship, but we also have a duty to exercise discernment to those closest to us who may be pulling us away from things that are good and pure. Don’t write these people off; instead pray for them.

In addition,

“Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others,” (Philippians 2:4).

The key to a good friendship is laying down your life for the other person. That basically sums us this post (and life in general, but we won’t get into that in this blog)! Christ is the first example of laying your life down for someone. If we take the ‘me’ factor out of situations, we really have nothing to complain about, nothing to be bitter about, and nothing to be angry about! And speaking of anger, if you come across a friend who is angry, remember anger is hurt in disguise. If we can learn how to dig deeper for one another and understand what is really going on instead of scratching the surface of people’s lives and truly invest in them, we can become a good and Godly friend. We all fight silent battles at one point or another in our lives, so let’s start to get to know each other, let’s remember each other, and let’s speak life into each other.

In order for us to protect the friendships we have in our lives currently, and for us to foster new ones, we must be willing to change the way we look at ourselves first, and then other people. What do we mean? Our overall perspective of ourselves mirrors into the relationships we pursue. If we are arrogant, jealous, and self-serving, then the end result will be a little lonely not just in our friendships, but in ourselves as well.

God loves community and interaction. Jesus’ entire ministry was based on this intense pursue of people and speaking truth into their lives. Sometimes this truth is tough to swallow, but we must be willing to be ambassadors of this truth to the people around us, and paradoxically we must be listeners and ‘obeyers’ of this truth when those close to us challenge us.

Friends, Jesus is the best standard for friendship and He longs to be YOUR friend on a personal level. He is willing to walk with you, listen to you, and guide you. If we are friends of Jesus, we have everything we will ever need, and we also get to steward and share this amazing Friend to others.

And so, we leave you with this word,

"Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you," Colossians 3:13.